Dancing to the music in my head…

just trying to make sense of it all

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Kids say the darndest things edition

Posted by Kristina Summers on July 21, 2010

 

  

  

Recently had a houseful of kids ranging in ages from 2-13 (if you don’t count me and my hubby who could probably qualify as the biggest kids of all!) Here are just a few of the more hilarious things said and overheard this past weekend: 

  

  

———————————————————————————————- 

“We have coyotes at our house now.” 

“Yeah?” 

“Yeah, my mom saw one and now she quit smoking.” 

—————————————————————————— 

“Do you guys get to camp much?” 

“yeah, we were gonna go camping but we had to go to the dentist.” 

—————————————————————————— 

“That’s a huge fish!” said after I showed them a picture of the record-breaking Flat-head catfish caught just last week in south Georgia

“You could catch one of those if you wanted too” 

“We only fish for regular fish.” 

—————————————————————————— 

“Rufus [the dog] has huge eyebrows” 

“fuzzy” 

“caterpillars are fuzzy” 

“but they don’t talk” 

—————————————————————————— 

“having fun is like the most fun thing.” 

—————————————————————————— 

“you don’t know where you’re going” (after I turned on the wrong road

“uh huh, she’s going on the road” (thanks for the confidence Se-bass!

—————————————————————————— 

  

Thanks kids for the laughs!

Posted in Family, In my head, Life in general, bliss, happiness | Tagged: , , , | Leave a Comment »

A Vacation of the Spirit

Posted by Kristina Summers on May 31, 2010

“Next time I  go looking for my hearts desire, I won’t need to look any further than my own backyard.” – Dorothy Gale, Wizard of Oz

After working for more than a year straight with no time real time off, I finally broke down and declared to the world that I would take a vacation. I think I actually shocked a few people but this post isn’t really about my work-a-holism. What it is about is making grand extravagant plans, because you feel that it is what you are expected to do, but then finding out that even the best laid plans are really trivial in the grand scheme of things…and that’s okay too.

I knew about a month in advance or so that I would be taking an entire two weeks away from the office, something simply unheard of for me. I went home each day and dreamed of the ocean, camping in the mountains, hiking with the family, all the things I never had time to do because I was always working. (actually to get the full effect of those words you have to say them in a slightly pre-pubescent whiny but semi-nasal voice over and over again. At least that is how it sounds coming out of my tween-ager’s mouth repeatedly).

Well as we all know, life happens. I woke up the first day with pink eye. Then spent the next several days frantically working to help my husband to finish up a project so that he too could enjoy a little time with me and the family while I was home. This included working all day on my birthday.Because of all the work (and because of limited finances) we ran out of time and opportunity for any kind of get-a-way so we ended up staying home for the entire two weeks. No beach, no camping, no mountains. drat.

So that was the downside.

The good news – I was able to attend my youngest son’s award ceremony and see him graduate from kindergarten and receive a special award for being an excellent artist. Then both me and my husband ate lunch with him, something he’s been begging me to do all year long. I kept saying I would, when I had time. I was finally able to keep my end of the bargain. That felt good.

I went to my oldest son’s final band performance and watched as he was one of three to receive best percussionist awards, he was beaming. He had never won any kind of artistic award like that at school.

We also finally finished his room and man does that Georgia Red paint pop. He was so proud to have helped with all the construction and when we moved his furniture in…I swear he was hiding tears from me. When he left for his dad’s for the summer I didn’t want to let him go, he’s growing up so fast.

I hosted my U4 soccer team “the Grumpies” final party and handed out to my little players their very first trophies. They hugged me and thanked me, before running off to play. I was so proud of all their efforts. I never imagined I would make it through a season of coaching seven toddlers.

Probably the best part of all….I danced, I sang, I played with reckless abandon in the sunshine, I went barefoot, I jumped on the bed with the kids, I chased the dog and laid in the grass and watched the clouds. It really didn’t hit me until today just how much fun I have had just being home, playing and being with my family.

Maybe we didn’t go to any exotic places, but  maybe sometimes you have to go through a few trials to realize that everything you need is right there in front of you and has been the whole time. Thanks Dorothy. I knew there was a reason Wizard of Oz is my all time favorite movie. :)






Posted in Family, In my head, Life in general, advice, bliss, happiness, work | Leave a Comment »

Don’t Forget to Play

Posted by Kristina Summers on April 12, 2010

I have to relate something that completely took me by surprise the other day. As most of you know, I have been making more of effort to get outside and play with the kids. Well what caught me off guard was just how spontaneous and uninhibited my kids (and I suspect most children) can be when engaged in creative play.

Many times I hang out with them in the yard, but rarely am I actually involved in their play, until a day or so ago. They begged me to play pretend. I finally conceded, and after first glancing around, you know to make sure no one was looking, I slipped the felt hat over my head. The kids began giggling then my son brandished his sword. all of the sudden I was in the moment and totally defending the fair princess (my daughter). After all, they had bestowed a great honor upon me, they had made me, the knight.

How many times do we watch our kids play and never actually join in, preferring to sit on the sidelines with a book, occasionally looking up and smiling? How much are we missing?

After our pretend games were over, my son wandered off and my daughter and I began to take turns jumping up and down on the culvert. No real reason, just to do it. She was so polite, taking turns and laughing. No tantrums, no hostility. I definitely liked this version of her better. when she lost interest we headed to the tree fort to play with the boys. About half-way there, my oldest calls out, “Mommey, what are you so happy about?” I looked up and shrugged, he said,” you are grinning like you are really happy about something.”

Wow, I didn’t even realize until that moment that yes, I was grinning ear to ear, just from playing, and it felt good to know the smile had come from within, where smiles should come from.

Who says that as we grow older we have to stop playing pretend, stop playing fetch with the dog, or dress up with our kids? Creative play makes you feel good and reconnects you with a part of your soul that tends to lie dormant, aching to be dusted off, the inner child inside all of us.

I’ve decided that playing a little bit everyday is just another aspect to the year of healthy living. I can’t wait to see what tomorrow brings! See you on the playground!

Posted in Family, In my head, Life in general, advice, bliss, change, happiness | Tagged: , , , , , | Leave a Comment »

Learning to say NO is GOOD for your health

Posted by Kristina Summers on April 9, 2010

Two weeks into month four of the Year of Healthy Living and I am learning another rather harsh lesson that I think in the end will serve me well.

After nearly 31 years, I am finally learning to say NO.

Understand that this does not come easy for me. As an avid over-achiever, southerner and a born people-pleaser there are are not many times in my life where saying no has been a real viable option for me. Sure I could have said it, but then I would have felt as if I were in some way admitting that I couldn’t do whatever was being asked to do, which is something my stubborn Taurus genes would never let me do. (My father still thinks I should have been some sort of lawyer for all the bull-headedness I possess.) Besides, it might have seemed rude.

However, as I embarked on my Year of Healthy Living, I was determined to make changes, and the leading the life of a super-mom, while praise-worthy, is also exhausting and not a lifestyle one can commit to for more than a few years at a time and expect to stay at a premium level of health.

I knew I couldn’t cut back on school being as close to being finished so I started looking to other areas for cut-backs. I realized that with as much as I had been working, I had a ton of comp time built up, time that needed to be taken. I wrestled with myself over that decision. Shorthanded at work, I felt that by taking time off I was somehow cheating people, or the agency.

I had made up my mind to take the time when a few things happened. First was a request for Earthday. I sighed as I tentatively wrote the date on the calendar then trudged down the hall to speak to a co-worker about our shared display already dreading having to do the outreach, which should have triggered something since outreach is actually one of the favorite aspects of my job.

I poked my head into my co-workers office and ran over the request with her, expecting support, maybe a sympathetic ear. Instead, she just  looked right at me and said in no uncertain terms to lose the message, that it wouldn’t kill me to say no this time. Then she went right back to working. Oh.

Since I didn’t leave right away she looked up and sighed, then explained that she had been diagnosed with shingles and that her doctor claimed that they had been brought on by stress, so she was taking steps to cut back on stress. She again went back to working. Oh.

I nodded and headed back down the hall, crumpling the message as I went. I sat at my desk and thought about what she had said. I thought about my frequent headaches, the stress brought on by the thought that I will never get everything completed in time. Well, what if I had a little less to do? Wouldn’t I feel better? Not to mention the quality of my work. Wouldn’t it increase?

So this month I am practicing saying no in various situations. At work, the extra committees will have to get along without me for now. I plan to focus on my high priorities and not much else and really do a bang-up job. At home, the phone stays off unless it is really needed. I don’t need to multi-task near as much as I desperately need to play and dance and sing and smile with my family.

I think that after a few weeks I will feel a lot less drained and a lot more relaxed, once I have introduced NO back into my vocabulary, reconnected with my inner-toddler and stamped my foot a few times to the music in my  head, the thing that started it all.

Posted in In my head | Leave a Comment »

Another Day, Another Choice

Posted by Kristina Summers on February 24, 2010

Another day is drawing to a close and once again I am having doubts (darn my overactive brain) about my healthy living decision…it would be so much easier if I wasn’t so impatient.
I stopped drinking soda and kinda expected that I would magically feel stronger…of course it doesn’t actually work that way. Just as removing sweets and most fast food from my diet didn’t automatically make me a pert size 6 either (geez I wish it were that simple, I’d be a billionaire!)
Well anyway, if you are a regular reader then you know that I am working hard to get myself back to a state of good health, not just for me but for my family and friends who’s lives and happiness mean so much more to me than my own selfish gratification.
However having said that, today was one of temptation…it was Girl Scout Cookie day. A co-worker friend of mine whom I adore has a lovely young daughter who sells these miracles in a box, these tasty treats that take me back to my own 11 years in uniform, going to camp and singing “make new friends” etc. This girl also writes personal thank-you notes to everyone who buys her cookies-how could I resist? Health and waistline be damned!
So my botanist co-worker and I (who have a get healthy pact) [he just had a mild heart attack at age 50] relaxed our rules for today only. We decided that total denial would be even more harmful than an occasional indulgence. Thus the first challenge of our year of healthy living has passed. Everything in moderation.

Just to be safe though, I did give away the rest of the cookies to other people. I have willpower but I’m not crazy!

Tomorrow’s another day!

Posted in Family, Life in general, advice, challenges, change, education, happiness, money, reason, stages of change | Tagged: , , , , | 1 Comment »

Odd question for the day

Posted by Kristina Summers on February 23, 2010

OK guys, got a challenge for you this morning…

"Flash your lights!"

Riddle me this,

Riddle me that,

Why on Earth,

Do you flash your headlights like that?

Is there some code I don’t understand?

I never see cops.

I rarely see deer,

in fact I almost never  see a reason why any normal person would stop.

So please, in the future,

and especially on the highway (in the early morn’)

don’t flash your brights,

thinking you’re helping poor little me.

“cause you’re not.

You are only blinding me,

and maybe causing me to run over harmless little bunnies in the process.

Thanks and have a wonderful Tuesday.

Harmless Little Bunny


Posted in In my head | Leave a Comment »

Breaking up is hard to do (with soda that is).

Posted by Kristina Summers on February 19, 2010

My year of healthy living has gotten off to a rather rough start. Instead of me getting to make noble choices and regally turning my nose up at certain foods and or activities, thereby leaving me with at least a shred of my dignity (it certainly would have made me feel a little better about turning down that second scoop of double chocolate ice cream), I had a very scary wake up call instead.

During the holiday season I fractured my hand. Nothing major about that in of itself, but when I told my orthopedic doctor that I had hurt it while playing with the kids he got one of those looks on his face you don’t ever want to see. You know what I mean if you’ve ever seen it. It begins with a slight raise of an eyebrow and then the subtle shadow of concern slowly falls across the features, not a good look when you are sitting on paper sheets that smell of antiseptic.

He suggested that we go ahead and run a bone density test,which sounded benign enough or so I told myself. I mean, I am only 30 years old, a cancer survivor, what could possibly be wrong now???

Skip ahead tp results time. He sat me down and hands me one of those squishy stress balls. I probably have a more than a dozen of these stress thing-a-ma-bobs in all sorts of shapes and sizes (what can I say I collect weird things ok?) so I begin to play with it, almost forgetting that I am there to get news about my bone density scan. Finally he clears his throat and I stop playing and look up to meet a somber expression. My file is open on his lap.

“So let’s see here….you’re 30 years old right….” (not actually a question) “well if your bones have anything to say about it you’re closer to 50.”

I dropped the ball.

My mouth fell open.

I thought I would have a stroke right then and there.

My bones were what??????

He went on to tell me that I was in the beginning stages of osteoporosis and needed to exercise (low impact), beef up on calcium and avoid certain foods and beverages that leached calcium or prevented calcium from being absorbed by my body.One of the biggies….soda.

I began to tune out as visions of my grandmother’s poor bent and gnarled hands danced before my eyes. She’s been through two surgeries and honestly I can;t remember a time when they weren’t twisted into “claws”.

I find myself often looking at my own hands and now sneaking glances at my mothers just for comparisons – there really are so many. Will my daughter end up the same way?

It has been more than a month since I received the glum news and giving up soda was horrible at first. I was a true diet soda addict, consuming several cans a day. But now that I am free of it, I feel like I can play with my daughter and maybe I am setting a better example for her. Maybe she won’t be in my predicament when she’s my age. I also signed her up along with my boys for soccer and agreed to be her coach.

Maybe my bones are a bit more brittle, but this is not the end for me. It was simply the wake up call I needed so that I can be around for a good while longer.

Posted in In my head | Leave a Comment »

The Year Of Healthy Living

Posted by Kristina Summers on January 22, 2010

Back in the waning hours of 2009 I wrote what remains to be one of my favorite posts concerning the things I had accomplished the previous year. I promised to follow-up with a more traditional approach to the new year with both resolutions and a lovely idea courtesy of Ms. Holly Hoffman, picking a theme for the year. My choice: The Year of Healthy Living.
Well needless to say, I got a little sidetracked and here it is quickly approaching the end of January and I have yet to deliver on my promise. So for that I am sorry but in the spirit of my chosen theme-the year of healthy living-I am making the conscience decision to set aside my unrealistic perfectionist tendencies and simply pick up where I left off. After all mental health is just as important as being physically sound.

Although I would not classify myself as a sickly person, I think just about everyone I have ever known would agree (with no exaggeration intended) that I have cheated death on more than a few occasions. From tornadoes, to sinking houseboats to fires and car accidents, it seems I have been inches from an untimely end more times than I care to count. I am probably also the most accident-prone person in the world. Case en point: Just in 2009 I dislocated my jaw, suffered a severe concussion after a nearly drowning when a boat flipped over on top of me, broke my toe and my hand and then endured nerve damage to my shoulder. I also survived hypothermia, and pneumonia as well as a pretty severe allergic reaction to inhaling rhododendron while on the fire line.

I tend to be anemic, cold averse with extremely low blood pressure, have poor circulation, brittle bones and heart disease (the scary kind that makes you drop dead at 50) runs rampant in my family. I have already endured a hysterectomy for cervical cancer, gall stones, a ruptured liver duct, petit-mal seizures, at least seven broken bones and am nearly blind in my left eye from a degenerative disease of the cornea.

Most people I tell this too just stare at me. I suppose I am blessed to have made it to 30.

So on that depressing note – I have decided to make this the year of healthy living. I intend to be more cautious, eat better and exercise more. I will not avoid the doctor and the dentist for fear of another crazy diagnosis but instead be much more proactive about my health.

After all, I have three beautiful babies that I really want to be around for, for as long as I my time on this Earth allows. I know it won’t be easy and I will have to make some tough choices but I figure it people I admire like Holly can do it, than so can I.

Wish me luck.

I think I’ll need it!

Posted in Family, In my head, Life in general, advice, career, challenges, change, change process, communications, computer, education, ethics, happiness, news, public relations, reason, stages of change, sucessful, training, transparent, wildlife | Tagged: , , , , , | 1 Comment »

Heading Into The New Year With Anticipation (Part I)

Posted by Kristina Summers on December 29, 2009

Almost a new year.

I can’t believe that 2009 will be over in a matter of days. It really has been an incredible year, incredibly fast that is. It seems that each year gets a little more hurried as I pack more and more into my life. It can be crazy and insanely tough, but honestly I wouldn’t change a thing.

It is about this time each year that I start looking back and wondering just what I will get myself into next year. Many people write out resolutions but I want to do something different this year. I’ll probably still make out a list, but in addition to that I am going to write down a list of all that I have managed to accomplish over the past 12 months. Not only does it give me a great big boost of confidence, which at times I sorely need, but it also reminds me that I CAN achieve anything I want to, as long as I just keep moving towards my goals.

The idea came to me from a fairly ordinary source. I go through a review process at work every six months. After my first one, I realized that while it may seem simple to recall all of the reasons why you should be kept around or even better be given a raise, it can actually be pretty hard, especially if you are as crazy busy and pressed for time as I am. My mentor suggested I keep an “accomplishments” folder to help me remember. Basically it works like this: every time I get an email that in any way praises something I’ve done I print it out. When I meet a tough (read IMPOSSIBLE) deadline, I make a note of it and toss it in the folder. After six months I can easily pull out my folder and summarize everything I’ve done to improve the organization.

It worked so well for my job that I decided to do something similar for each year for all the other parts of my life. So now I keep a folder with pretty much everything that was flattering, an accomplishment, a triumph of spirit or just a great learning experience in it. I am now approaching 2010 with my first complete list in hand, ready to go over it in preparation for another incredibly wonderful, but insanely speedy year. And as cheesy and idealistic as that sounds, I find that as I look over it I really do feel much more optimistic about how I am spending my life.

The next step to the process is rather than go through a review as I would at work, I will share the list (in summary form) here on my blog with all of you. In doing so maybe it will help to inspire someone else to keep pushing against the odds, that there is in fact light at the end of the tunnel even if that tunnel seems interminably long sometimes.

To go one better in part two of this post I will also including my usual list of resolutions in addition to my accomplishments.So here you go. Read, comment and share your own accomplishments!

2009 in a nutshell:

Over the last year I crossed over that invisible line between what I used to think was “old” and the reality of being 30 years old and knowing that age is completely relative despite the scary realization that my first-born also became a preteen this year. I completed the second year of a job that I really want to become my career despite a couple of life-threatening incidents including an insane asthma attack during my first interior ignition on a 2000 acre prescribed burn (got it all on film though) and a midnight boat accident that trapped me underwater with alligators and a  dislocated jaw and also gave me a concussion and an odd scar on my nose.

I came through some of the most challenging moments of my marriage, with a renewed passion and stronger bond with my husband than I ever thought possible.While not a prince on a white horse, he’s the sexiest, most compassionate and forgiving frog I could have ever hoped to kiss and spend the rest of my life with. D, I love you.

My kids achieved amazing milestones including a first band concert for my percussion-playing 12-year-old and a  first bus ride to kindergarten for my five-year old (with only minimal tears from me). I nearly cried when my little boy wrote his own name, when my daughter said “mommy hold me,” and when my oldest son beat me at checkers for the first time without me going “easy” on him. There were soccer tournaments, surprise parties and a boy-scout camporee. I introduced them to snow, snakes, frogs, turtles, bats, birds, fire, lichens, bugs and the values of conservation including a river clean-up and the first ever right whale festival. It is amazing that their successes, their wonder make me feel successful as well, as a parent, as a woman, and as a person.Having happy, healthy, curious and vibrant children is a reflection of the tireless combined efforts of both me and my husband, a team we are both embarrassingly proud of.

I grew professionally, designing and implementing the first social media program for the state agency where I work. In addition to that program I created a handbook (that is regularly updated and re-released) for that program that was shared state-wide, then nation-wide, and used to create similar programs for other wildlife agencies. I spoke at both a local and a regional conference on social media and conservation, and was then asked to serve as a member of a state-wide task force to help promote wildlife conservation through social media. The first DVD I ever produced received a near perfect score by an independent panel made up of wildlife communication professionals from all over the country, giving me both the confidence and the credibility to go forward with additional videos and the resources to create an entire video production program within my division. I completed fire training, passed my pack test, held an alligator, shocked fish, identified lichens, helped build a cave gate for bats and may have discovered a new habitat for a crayfish. Pretty cool.

I achieved good grades in graduate school despite working 60+ hour weeks and traveling extensively, not to mention caring for three children. Amazingly I was also accepted into an MS program for conservation ecology after being told my whole life that science and math weren’t my “thing” – and I am excelling within the program! I was asked to guest lecture not once but twice for a college course and even discussed co-teaching a class on social media with an old professor.

I am finally approaching my pre-baby weight going from a 12 to an 8, but actually feeling healthier than I ever did before my three children and realizing that I haven’t actually stepped on a scale daily for months and knowing I’m okay with that, a true sign I am really recovering from years of disordered eating.

Neither of my two main blogs have brought me fame or fortune, but I know what it feels like to be at the top of a Google search (I outranked the Texas stripper with my name) and to be featured consistently on sites like Brazen Careerist and Damsels in Success. I received an excellent review by a top-ranked blogger and made the move to WordPress without losing any readers. I started a business of my own with my family, including a family story blog that my kids are having a ball with helping out on. It really feels good to be creating something lasting and possibly lucrative with my children that doesn’t involve exploiting them as a stage mom.

So as you can see, I’ve had an incredible year. Stay tuned for part II when I go over what I intend to do next year!

Posted in Family, In my head, Life in general, blog, brazen careerist, career, challenges, change, change process, communications, education, graduate students, happiness, networking, online identity, reason, sucessful, wildlife, work | 3 Comments »

Merry Christmas from the Muppets!

Posted by Kristina Summers on December 23, 2009

Click here for a hilarious rendition of the “12 days of Christmas”!

Posted in In my head | Leave a Comment »